Two hours. That's all the sleep I had. As I tossed and turned in a feverish stupor, trying to avoid pain by not swallowing, I contemplated my choices. The girls had a birthday party to attend, one they had been much anticipating. It was at Chuck E Cheese after all. Hubby was working in the morning and could not take them. The birthday girl could only invite four friends, so if I had bailed with my two girls she would have had a very small birthday gathering.

At 6 when one of the children woke with a bloody nose, I ran to the rescue. After we got her all cleaned up, she said, "Today's the big day mommy!" She was excited. I couldn't bear to let her down.

Every swallow felt like knives were stabbing me in the throat. I knew it was strep. I knew that going would expose my friends to strep, but what's a mommy to do? We went to the party against my better judgment, especially since it was an hour away and I was driving on so little sleep. I couldn't let my girls down.

When mommy is sick, life cannot stop. There are simply too many responsibilities that, frankly, no one else can fill. There are little people that depend on Mommy to feed, clean, dress, and emotionally care for them. There is a house that must be kept up. I look around my living room as I type wondering why the kids got into the candy, how I am going to get the energy to clean up the toys, and who is going to bathe them, a task always relegated to me, yet it hurts to talk and answer little people questions.

Add to this a career, especially an at-home career, and you have a difficult quandary. Things have to get done, even when mommy is sick. Not only are little people depending on you, but clients are too.

I have often thought on the unfairness of it all. Daddies can take the day off from their jobs and sleep, while the mommies keep the kids quiet so they can get their rest, but mommies have to keep chugging on, unless we are lucky enough to get sick on the weekend and have a daddy who doesn't work on the weekends. Mommies don't get sick days, yet this is a path I have chosen for myself and I wouldn't trade it for all of the sick days in the world.

The doctor verified my self diagnosis later this afternoon. I texted the mom from the party telling her and apologizing, and she sweetly said, "I'm not worried. We were exposed to so much junk at that place I am sure." The kids had fun, and I survived. Hubby graciously took over when I got home so I could sleep. I have another full day of help from the hubby tomorrow, as well as medication that should kick this thing quickly, so this sickness I will survive and actually get a little TLC.

I guess it could be worse!

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